To Encourage You

Ephesians 5:28 “He who loves his wife loves himself.”

There are some things in the Bible that are so easy to pass over.  If you are a Christian, you’ve likely read the passage above many times. I know I have.  But have we really stopped to think about it?!  Has it ever caused us to sit up and take notice?! 

Chapter 5 of Ephesians starts with the following words: “Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.”  It follows this with an elaboration of what that looks like in very down to earth ways, and it also tells us what it doesn’t look like.  It starts with a discussion of sexual immorality.  People typically engage in this behavior because they think it benefits them.  They enjoy it. But the Bible says that one day that behavior will be exposed for what it is, disobedience to God, and if it is never repented of and that disobedience defines someone’s life, they will find themselves shut out forever from God’s presence in heaven.  So, in the end, such behavior is of no benefit to a person whatsoever.  They are hurting themselves by it. 

Then Ephesians 5 turns to the family and what love looks like there.  It talks about children obeying their parents and wives submitting to and respecting their husbands.  But it is the words to husbands that got my attention this morning, for since I am one, it’s talking directly to me.  It tells us that there is a mysterious union in a marriage in which the married couple is called “one flesh” by God.  It is a union that is so intimate that as one part of that union is affected, it absolutely affects the other part.  I can tell you that if someone mistreats my wife, it certainly affects me very deeply. But what if that person is me? What if I am the one that is unkind to her, or what if I treat her in ways that I wouldn’t want to be treated? What good does that do for me?  In what ways does selfish behavior towards my wife bring any benefit to me?  Well, it doesn’t!  It does nothing but hurt me, for I’m hurting my own flesh.  On the other hand, when I love my wife, when I sacrifice my own desires to bring blessing to her, I’m also blessing myself.  That’s just the way love works. 

It’s the same within the church.  1 Corinthians 12 tells us that the church is like a body and each part of that body has a vital function.  It tells us that just as the “the eye cannot say to the hand, ‘I have no need of you,’ nor again the head to the feet, ‘I have no need of you.’ On the contrary, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable.”  In other words, we need each other just as each part of a physical body needs the other parts. Furthermore, it tells us that “If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together.”  But what if the cause of that suffering is me?  Conversely, what if I am a person who acts in a way that brings joy to others?  It’s just like in that marriage relationship, that suffering or that joy boomerangs around to us! 

May God help us to take notice of the wisdom that is available to us in what He’s told us, for He’s telling us that so much of what comes to our lives is a direct result of how we affect the lives of others.